For Penny. The Story Behind the Blue Tit Design.

Some of you might be asking, ‘Why have you designed a Blue Tit, Jin?’ Well, you can't deny they are incredibly cute little birds. There's a lot of meaning behind these little cheerful creatures. If you spot a blue tit, it is often seen as a symbol of joy and good luck, bringing a sense of positivity into your day. But I only discovered these reasons after I designed it. The inspiration came from someone very special. And here’s the story behind it.

Blue Tit on a Milk bottle

I love blue tits. Living by the seaside, I don’t get to see many. But they remind me of growing up, in the leafy suburbs of Harpenden, where we used to get the milk delivered every day. And the blue tits used to break open the milk tops and steal the milk, much to my mother’s annoyance! Their bright colours were always a delight to watch from the window onto the garden. And it always felt like a rare treat to spot one.

It can be difficult coming up with new designs. You can’t please all the people all the time. And sometimes you have to go with what feels right. And this one has never felt more right.

I started designing my Blue Tit character a few months ago. It was at a time when I was looking after a dear friend and neighbour of mine, Penny. Penny was on a steady decline with cancer which at this stage had spread throughout her body. It was her 5th year of living with the disease. She had already beaten the odds of living this long. And she was determined to keep on living.

Jinny and Penny

I would meet up with her every few days to help with her medication and make sure she was doing ok. Often we would go out for a walk and a coffee. And we talked about life. I loved to hear about Penny’s life, and all the chapters and times that had passed. It felt such a privilege to have that precious time with someone, to hear about their life and what they wanted to share with you, when you knew that they didn’t have long left on this earth.

Penny loved nature. I remember her coming in to mine for a coffee when she was too weak to go out that day. It was a day in March. She sat on my sofa and said, 'I'd like to live til the end of April, as I want to see the bluebells.' She was very determined to live - and to enjoy the simple things that we often take for granted.

Normally I would go up to see Penny every few days. Luckily, she only lived 2 floors up in our block of flats, with her husband Alan, so it was handy for being able to pop in and help with things. She said on one visit ‘Have you started your new design yet?’ Penny often asked about my designs and was even known to share a few of my products with family and friends. I said I wasn’t sure. Perhaps I might do some kind of nature collection - a dragonfly, or ladybird or something. She loved those ideas. But I still wasn’t sure what to create. Had I lost the ability to create? Or was it the uncertainty of how the next design would be received that was stopping me from designing? It was certainly beginning to feel that way.

Then one day, after a coffee with Penny, I came across a beautiful photo on Facebook, taken by nature photographer, Matt Wells. It was a blue tit. It was this one…

Blue Tit by Matt Wells

I saw it and immediately thought, that’s the one. That’s what I’m going to create. So I set about designing my Blue Tit. I told Penny and she loved the idea. This motivated me further. I struggled with the beak and the head and went backwards and forwards with the design for a couple of weeks. I almost gave up. It seemed pointless. ‘Who’s going to be interested in a blue tit anyway!’ was the negative thoughts going round my head. But a small voice inside my head answered ‘Who cares what people think. Do it because you love it. And for those that matter to love it.’

In the end, after tweaks and more tweaks, I finally cracked it. I felt really happy with it. I loved it. This bright little bird was a joy to look at. I printed it out on a sheet of A4 and sat looking at it on and off for a few days, wondering whether to make the costly decision to proceed. Bringing out a new design is not a cheap feat. The doubts were creeping in again.

Blue Tit designing by Jin Designs

Meanwhile, time was passing by. Penny had begun to struggle to walk. But each time I saw her, she really made me realise, that the struggles I thought I had with day to day, were nothing compared to what she was going through. Each day she forced herself to get up, get dressed and do what she could. She was making the most of each and every moment. Seeing friends, going out for lunch, enjoying time with her grandkids and children. Every day there was something to live for.

But slowly, the time that she could do things with her day got shorter and shorter. It didn’t put her off though. From walking stick to walking frame to wheelchair, we still managed to get out, sometimes for a coffee but as time went on, just a chance to enjoy the fresh sea air and the sky.

Then one day when she was too weak to go out, she came in for a sit down and some time on my sofa. I was careful with Penny to make sure when she saw me, it was her time. But that day, something made me show her the design I’d been working on. I had printed it out and stuck it to a mug. Her face lit up. She loved it. She said to me ‘Now, I want to see that before I go, so you better get on and do it'.

Jin Designs Blue Tit

I sent it to the screen printers straight away. And I contacted my trusty mug manufacturers to tell them a new design was on the way. Everything was in place and finally the new design was in production. All that was left to do now was to hope that the mug would arrive in time for Penny to see.

A couple of weeks later, Penny moved into the Martlets Hospice. By that time, life was becoming very difficult for her. I knew that regular visits from her family, and me doing the things I was doing, was not enough to give her the help she needed. And whilst each day was a blessing to see her alive, you knew that each day was becoming harder for her to live.

Being in the hospice was a chance for Penny to be properly looked after by some amazing people. The care that she had was just something else. She was apprehensive about going, as I think we all would be. But she was treated so well and with such compassion.

I went to visit her every day, along with her loving family.  It was incredibly hard, especially for her family, who had to watch this wonderful person slipping away. 

I’ve never watched someone dying before. Even right at the end, Penny would light up as you walked through the door. I know she was incredibly grateful for the help I gave her towards the end of her life. But I can’t tell you how grateful I am for all she brought to my life too. It was a wonderful privilege to get to know her during that precious time. Her bright nature and positivity and determination to live is a lesson to us all. Even when life didn’t seem worth living with the immense pain and suffering, Penny would find a reason. 

Her family kept her going as long as they could. And I tried too. But in the end Penny really wanted to go. I held her hand one day and she told me she was ready to go. She looked sad, exhausted and the life was draining from her. I said to her as much as we all loved her and wanted her to stay with us, she would know when the time was right for her. She thanked me again and I thanked her too. We looked at each other and I knew we both knew how much we had helped each other. I said ‘I’ll never forget you Penny’. We had a big hug and as I turned to walk away, we waved each other goodbye. 

That was the Saturday morning. I couldn’t go and see her on Sunday. It was the one day I didn’t go. And she floated away, like a bird in the sky, during the early hours of Monday morning 24th April 2023. 

Penny leaves behind an amazing family and a number of wonderful friends, some of whom have been with her since school times, others who have joined her along the way as she journeyed through life. 

We’ve all shared such special moments with a truly beautiful soul. And thankfully we were all able to come together for a celebration of her life at her funeral two weeks after she died.

It was the morning my Blue Tit mugs arrived.

Blue Tit Mug by Jin Designs

So Penny, this one is for you. God bless you. We will never forget you. 

Penny Hastings-Jones

A percentage of net sales made from the Jin Designs Blue Tit Collection, with a minimum donation of £1,000, will be donated to the Martlets Hospice. 

VIEW THE BLUE TIT COLLECTION